Welcome to the the Beyond Stuckness Program
Course 01 - January 2015
Congratulations for taking the first step to getting beyond stuckness in your business, marketing and life.
Please bookmark this page in your web browser, as there is no link to it from the main site.
Information for the upcoming course is below.
First, make sure to read over The Unstuck Process E-book a few times before you do the program.
Assignment for first session: Make a list of all the areas where you are stuck in your business or your marketing. Download the Stuckness Sheet and fill it out.
Teleconference dates: Jan 15, 22, 29, Feb 5, 12, 19
Sessions are held on Thursday Mornings at 9 am to 10:30 am Pacific time.
Each of the teleconference sessions is 90 minutes long.
Call-in teleconference number: You will get your own Maestro Conference Number
Please call in five minutes early so we can start on time.
Recordings and worksheets for each session.
To listen to the recording, click to play or download with the link below the player. Any materials for that session will be posted underneath the recording.
Session 1 - Jan 15
Assignment this week
This week work on doing one or more Unstuck Worksheets. Do them slowly and deliberately, making sure every answer you get is the highest truth for you in the moment. You don't have to think and judge and evaluate your answers, you want to simply answer and see if that answer is true.
Session 2 - January 22
Assignment this week:
Download this Form and make a list of 5 stuck beliefs plus the costs and payoffs of each belief.
With this exercise, you want to be clear about the distinctions of Beliefs, Costs and Payoffs.
Belief - A though you are convinced is true (but is not necessarily true. Constrictive, fearful or limiting beliefs and the ones you want to notice.
Cost - The consequences of believing a limiting belief. Usually a belief like this prevents us from moving forward with something and puts us into a pattern of avoidance. There is also a cost to your frame of mind, attitude, self-esteem, etc.
Costs are real and they are often very high. But in the moment when we react to a belief, we don't see the costs as the costs are seen as being in the future, and not too important right now.
Payoff - What you get out of identifying with a limiting belief. What benefit you get is always related to survival, that is, not being hurt in any way. Limiting beliefs are there to protect us. So the payoff is that we get to stay in our comfort zones (where it's safe), and avoid any danger zones where we might get hurt (physically or emotionally). These beliefs are designed to avoid any possible pain or harm to ourselves.
Payoffs are not real in most cases, and almost always imaginary, so the payoff is very low compared to the costs. But payoffs usually win, as the threat to our survival feels immediate and visceral.
This work helps us contrast the costs and the payoffs so that the costs become more real and the payoffs become less real. When you see through an imaginary payoff, it's action in us starts to weaken and ultimately disappear.
Session 3 - January 29
Assignment this week:
Work at noticing your limiting/fearful thoughts. When you notice one, ask the question: "Who would I be without this belief?" Do it several times during the week.
Also, use this form to do this exercise. This will help you become clear about the distinctions of your avoidance behavior, your belief that is triggering this behavior and who you would be without this belief. You'll find detailed instructions on the form.
When you work at catching yourself in a limiting belief during the day, there are challenges to doing this - mostly just remembering. So set up a system to help you remember - put a PostIt on your computer, refrigerator, bathroom mirror, etc. Put a time to do it in your calendar. Set an alarm on your smart phone for every three hours, etc. And remember, all it takes is a minute or less to do this. Also, better to zero in one one belief, not a whole lot of beliefs.
Session 4 - February 5
Assignment this week
Work at getting to Core Beliefs. Take a surface belief such as, "If I follow-up with someone I'll get rejected," or "I don't have the time for marketing." Then work at getting to a deeper belief by asking: "What would I have to believe to believe that (previous) belief?" or "What's under that belief?" Keep going 4 to 6 levels deeper until you get to a core belief. Sometimes it helps to distance yourself when you try to get to a Core Belief - "What would someone (not I) have to believe to believe that (previous) belief.
Use this form to help you with this process.
A Core Belief is almost always a fundamental statement about yourself others or life, such as, "I'm not good enough," "People don't love me," "I'm not able to do it," "Nobody understands me," "I'm not worthy," "Things never work for me," etc. Core Beliefs are always simple like that.
Notice that your Core Belief is like a "brake" to being who you really are and what's possible for you. When you are coming from that Core Belief, you are "putting the brake on" and stopping forward movement. Remember, the payoff to that belief or brake is some sort of comfort or avoidance of pain. And it all happens instantaneously, automatically, without thought or reflection.
Once you notice a Core Belief, don't try to change, avoid or manipulate it. No, instead, you just want to tell the truth about it by doing an Unstuck Worksheet on it. Look it right in the eye and uncover it for what it is. Since your Belief is the 4th question in the process, write down your Core Belief under #4 and then answer the first questions: 1. What am I resisting or avoiding when I'm believing that? 2. What am I feeling when I'm believing that? 3. How am I reacting and behaving when I'm believing that? And then go to question #5 on to the end of the process.
Do this with one or two beliefs this week. First identify the surfaces beliefs, then the Core Beliefs and then do the Worksheet on the Core Beliefs.
If you need to get a partner to work with, connect with a partner you have or connect with someone on the class list. Link to the class list. Do what you need to do to make this happen. Remember, it's just another limiting belief that prevents you from connecting with someone!
Session 5 - February 12
Assignment this week.
Download this "Reality-Unreality" worksheet. Read the information and do the exercise at the end of the sheet.
In this session we made a clear distinction between Reality and Unreality. When we are living in reality, things flow, there is little resistance and struggle. It becomes clear to us where to go and what to do. And we experience happiness, peace and fulfillment in everything. Reality is where we belong. Reality is who we are. We do not need to fight and struggle to get to reality. Instead we need to become aware of unreality and its consequences and agendas.
Unreality is a state of confusion, ignorance, struggle and stress. This is where we live most of the time, although we are rarely aware of it. We come under the hypnotic influence of limiting, fearful beliefs that tell us that things are not OK and that they need to be different and conform to our own requirements for comfort, avoidance of pain, control, dominance, justification and being right.
The Unstuck Process is a powerful tool to shift us (even if only momentarily) from Unreality to Reality. Once we get a taste of reality and the enormous benefits it bestows, it becomes interesting, even exciting to explore how unreality has controlled our lives up to this point. And we become more and more interested in ways to wake up from unreality. But we won't get there by trying to figure it out. We get there by inquiring into our limiting, fearful beliefs and ultimately discovering that they are unreal, insubstantial phantoms no more real than the Boogieman.
Session 6 - February 19
Assignment this week
Now that the course is complete, work at completing all the assignments not completed so far. Don't leave anything unfinished. This means filling out all forms for each session and doing the associated exercise.
For the final week, pick what I called the "One Big Issue" on the call and do a worksheet on this. If you need to get to a Core Belief in the process, go all the way. Your One Big Issue is some project or challenge you avoid habitually, or you experience as a major stuckness right now. Get to the bottom of that one.
Discover everything you believe about it, all your opinions about it, all the justifications about it, etc. These are just smoke screens to keep you from exploring it. It wants to stay just where it is. Why? To survive of course! It's job is to keep you comfortable, out of pain, and safe. But when you really look, you may discover this is a complete illusion. What's on the other side of your One Big Issue?
Thank you for participating in the program. I wish you the very best in your journey from Unreality to Reality!